Helping Our Children Choose Their Friends

“Do not be misled: bad company corrupts good character.”

— 1 Corinthians 15:33 (NIV)

    As a parent, have you ever thought about helping your children choose their friends?  You may think – that’s not my role as a parent or my child should be able to choose his/her own friends.  In my humble opinion, I think that parents should play a huge role in who their children consider as friends and spend time with. 

    I was always on the look out for good friends for my sons.  Since I volunteered in the children’s ministry at my church, I had special insight into the children who attended.  I closely observed the child’s and parents’ demeanors.  Did the parents bring their children to church every Sunday or just once in a while?  Were they on time?  Were the children clean and fed?  Did they have good manners?  Did the parents and/or children use bad words?   Did the children tell lies?  What did the family do over the weekend?  Was reading and doing well in school important to the child and parents? 

    I took the scripture verse in 1 Corinthians 15:33 very seriously because I knew that bad company has a very negative effect on good character.  I wanted to raise two sons who would be Godly young men.  Yes, I was called a strict parent, but what is the alternative?  I encourage you to play a very active role in your children’s lives rather than just being a spectator. 

Author Soraya Diase Coffelt

Children Are Precious Gifts From God So Treat Them As Such

“Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, the fruit of the womb is a reward.”

— Psalm 127:3 (NASB)

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We just finished the Christmas season with gift giving being an important part of the celebration (of course, with Jesus at the center of it all).  Many of us gave or received beautiful and expensive gifts.  But did you know that your children are also precious gifts from God? 

What have we done with those gifts we received this Christmas that were “precious” to us?  Of course, we made sure that the gifts were well taken care of, safe and protected because we certainly do not want anything to happen to them.  They are too important to us.  We also spend time with those gifts, whether it is wearing them or driving in them, or going somewhere special with them.  Since the gifts are so valuable to us, we want to make sure we spend significant time with them, not just a few minutes. 

As gifts directly from God, don’t your children deserve such treatment, and even better?  Think about ways that you can make your children feel that they are such precious gifts too you each and every day.   Please don’t skip a day, though, because their memories can be short. 

Author Soraya Diase Coffelt

Laughing and Reading at the Same Time

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What do children love to do and is very natural for them?  To laugh!  Also, we have all heard about how good laughter is for us because it helps reduce stress.  

According to the website for the Women’s and Children’s Network on Kids’ Health, some children did a survey of what made the people in their class laugh.  Here is what they found:

• "My little brother makes me laugh because he does such funny things - he's only a baby."

• "Knock knock jokes."

• "Watching funny movies."

• "My friend - because he is really funny."

• "My favorite comedians."

• "Hanging out with my friends because we have fun together and laugh a lot."

• "Watching home movies, especially when mom and dad look so funny with their hairstyles and the clothes they had when they were young."

Since my passion is to promote reading, I would like to connect the dots between encouraging reading and laughter. One of the types of books we had at our home for our sons to read were joke books.  We loved to laugh and our sons seemed to be natural at laughing and joking around.  The joke books were a special family treat on occasions.

Today, with the expansion of the internet, there are all sorts of websites that have good, clean jokes and riddles for children to read and enjoy.  So, spend some time laughing and reading with your children.  Those will be very special times indeed!

Author Soraya Diase Coffelt

Some Suggestions for New Year’s Resolutions to Promote Reading

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Happy new year!  Yes, it’s 2016 and I have some suggestions for new year’s resolutions to help promote reading in your family.  

#1 – Plan weekend family outings to your local library.  I cannot mention enough about the wealth of information and books that are available in public libraries.  Search the internet to find out what your library has to offer on the weekends for children and attend the events.  Above all, check out books and other material for your children to read, at no cost!

#2 – Have a variety of reading materials available at home.  Don’t let your children get bored with what reading materials you have.  In addition to fiction, have biographies, comic books, audible books, and books in other formats (on your Kindle or iPad).  

#3 – Intentionally set aside time each day to read.  That will take discipline on your part.  One of the best times to read is when you are putting your child to bed at night, or after dinner is finished.  Don’t wait until you are totally exhausted and sleepy to do this.  Plan time for reading in your schedule as you would any other important event.  Remember – your child is worth it!

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#4 – Limit the video and computer games.  Children can sit in front of a screen (whether a large computer screen or the small screen on your mobile phone) playing games endlessly.  Many parents use these games as babysitters.  Instead of just having your child play these games, try downloading some good books and have your child read them.  That way, they will sit quietly and develop good reading habits at the same time.

Of course, there are many more suggestions that I can make.  But, let’s start with these in 2016.  You will be taking a huge step by making and following through with these resolutions. 

Author Soraya Diase Coffelt

Mentors Wanted – Will You Apply?

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    People frequently complain about the direction that many of our young men and women are going.  Music, clothing, hair, speech – all of these are subjects of complaints.  Instead of complaining though, I believe that we should diligently seek to bring assistance.  That’s where mentors are needed.

    When was the last time that you mentored a child or young adult?  The Apostle Paul is a very good example for us to follow.  He was a mentor to young Timothy, whom Paul referred to as “his true son in the faith”.   Paul knew both Timothy’s mother, Eunice, who converted to the faith, and his grandmother, Lois.  Paul credited much of Timothy’s good upbringing to his mother and grandmother. As a mentor, you should get to know the child’s family as that will help you fully understand the child. 

    Paul spent a lot of time with Timothy as they often traveled and ministered together.  Timothy was in a unique position to walk daily side by side with Paul, listen to Paul, and learn from Paul’s preaching as well as observe his demeanor. Timothy was dedicated to Paul and serving God, and as a result, Paul referred to him as “his fellow worker”.   As a mentor, you should spend time with the child so the child can learn from you. Remember that you are serving as a role model, so be extremely attentive to your every word and movement.  

    Paul frequently expressed his praise and love for Timothy.  Paul referred to him as his faithful son and his beloved child. He was proud to send Timothy to help others as Timothy had served him well and publicly commended Timothy’s service to him - as a child serves a father.  As a mentor, you should encourage and praise a child often.  Look for the good rather than the bad.  

    Don’t complain – help.  Our children and young adults need your assistance in mentoring them. 

Creative Ways to Help Your Children Become More Thankful and Encourage Reading at the Same Time

Image from www.courageforkids.com

    I write often about the importance of literacy.  Since this month is November - the month of Thanksgiving Day - I want to merge the concepts of being thankful with reading.  How can we help our children become more thankful and encourage reading at the same time?

    As a Christian, I always turn first to the Bible for guidance.  With so many research tools available online as well as electronic Bibles, it is relatively easy to search for verses with the words “thanks” and “thankful” in the Bible.  There are many.  Encourage your children to read some of these verses and write them down.  One of my favorite verses is Psalm 188:1 - “Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever.” 

    Another idea is to have your children write on sticky notes once a day what they are thankful for and create an area in your home where they can put up these sticky notes as reminders.   Examples are “I’m thankful for my dog” and “I’m thankful for a sunny day to play outside” and “I’m thankful for food to eat today”.  Encourage your children to read them every day.  

    Also, help your children write “thank you” notes for gifts or for any occasion when such a note can be used.  I recently received in the mail a “thank you” card from one of my teenage nieces thanking me for a birthday gift I sent to her.  It was very special to me because it showed me that she took the time to think about thanking me and about what to write to me and then she took the time to actually write it out to me.  That one little handwritten note showed me that she cared for me and wanted to let me know how much she cared.  

    The list of ideas is endless.  Begin incorporating some in your day to day activities. 

Author Soraya Diase Coffelt

Getting Our Boys to Read More

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MY son, James, with his first book.

Many parents talk about the difficulties they have in getting their sons to read more.  They complain about the fact that reading is seen as being nerdy and it’s challenging to find books that boys like.  In classrooms, teachers often seem at a loss as to how to encourage the boys to read more.  Many just don’t know about the plethora of subjects that boys like to read about and what books are available.  

 I’m a mother of two sons and understand those sentiments.  However, I profoundly believe that parents should be determined and assertive in fostering the good habit of reading in their children.  My late husband and I were good role models for our sons because we read a lot, individually and as a family.  I often would go to my sons’ schools to speak to teachers if I believed reading wasn’t being encouraged enough and suggested good books for the students.  We even purchased books for a school’s library to encourage reading.  

 Now with the internet, there is so much information available and even websites dedicated to boys reading such as www.guysread.com so there is no excuse.  Don’t just sit back and expect your children, especially boys, to develop the love of reading.  Find out what subjects they are interested in and then go and look for books on those subjects.  If your son is interested in robots for example, actively search for books on robots.  I found that my sons loved reading books about intergalactic wars and soon found that many came in wonderful series.  We visited bookstores and libraries to get as many books in various series as we could.  

I would love to hear what you have done to encourage your children to read, especially your sons.  Please let me know.

When was the Last Time that You Read a Fairy Tale to Your Child?

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From Disney's The Princess & the Frog movie.

“If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales.”

— Albert Einstein

    Oh those wonderful fairy tales!  I read so many as I was growing up.   The Princess and the Frog - Cinderella – Rumpelstiltskin – Little Red Riding Hood - and many, many more.  Those stories were so enjoyable and filled with immense creativity that stirred my imagination.  Are there really talking frogs? Why would a princess kiss a frog?  Can a frog actually turn into a handsome prince?  Would the prince ever be able to turn back into a frog again?
    
    Why read fairy tales to and with your children?  The genius Albert Einstein knew why, and that is the foundation for his quote which inspired my blog post.  He understood what I as a child experienced while reading them – a creative imagination being massaged and developed.  Fairy tales cause a child’s mind to think outside of the box, beyond every day natural occurrences.  They stir a young brain to work and think differently and to ask questions.  If a princess will kiss a frog, what else is possible? With our imagination, we can imagine anything.   I truly believe that Einstein read so many fairy tales that they eventually impacted his intelligence, ultimately causing him to come up with the theory of relativity.  

Author Soraya Diase Coffelt

A Child’s Vocabulary at Age 2 Can Determine That Child’s Ultimate Success in Kindergarten and Life

Some people may believe that the title of this blog is an exaggeration.  Can a child’s vocabulary at age 2 truly predict the child’s success in kindergarten and later in life?  So says author Aaron Loewenberg, a former kindergarten teacher who is now focusing his efforts on education policy and leadership after obtaining a master’s degree, in his recent online article New Research: Two-Year-Old Vocabulary Predicts Kindergarten Success.  Importantly, don’t just take his word for it.

Loewenberg cites many studies showing not only that a child’s success in kindergarten is based on the child’s vocabulary, but also the child’s success throughout life.  In fact, he states that “children who enter kindergarten with strong early reading and math skills are more likely to attend college, own homes, and have 401(k) savings. They are also more likely to be married and live in higher income neighborhoods once they reach adulthood.”  

Links are provided to all the studies that he cites, giving the reader an opportunity to look at the research articles and findings.   Of great concern are the findings that children from lower income families suffer the most from the lack of vocabulary skills.  Early intervention is the key – with “early” referring to the years before kindergarten.  Loewenberg concludes as follows: “If this new study linking the vocabulary of two-year-olds to kindergarten success proves anything, it’s that it’s never too early to start building the vocabulary skills of our youngest learners.”  I wholeheartedly agree!

Read the entire article by CLICKICLICKING HEREG HERE.

Author Soraya Diase Coffelt

Scientific Evidence That Reading Positively Affects Children’s Brains

In a study issued in April, 2015, the American Academy of Pediatrics revealed scientific evidence of the positive effects that reading has on younger children. For years, pediatricians have encouraged new parents to read to their babies as early and often as possible. Now there is actual scientific proof through MRI testing establishing how reading to children influences different brain activities which then helps in the development of oral language skills and ultimately reading skills.  The children who were a part of the scientific study underwent MRI testing while they were listening to stories via headphones. The researchers were able to monitor their brain activity.  Here is an excerpt from the article in Science Daily that discusses the findings:

“We are excited to show, for the first time, that reading exposure during the critical stage of development prior to kindergarten seems to have a meaningful, measurable impact on how a child’s brain processes stories and may help predict reading success,” said study author John Hutton, MD, National Research Service Award Fellow, Division of General and Community Pediatrics, Reading and Literacy Discovery Center, Cincinnati Children’s Hospital Medical Center. “Of particular importance are brain areas supporting mental imagery, helping the child ‘see the story’ beyond the pictures, affirming the invaluable role of imagination.”

— Science Daily

Read more of the article by CLICKING HERE.