Discipline

Are Your Parenting Skills Consistent?

As Christian parents, we want to raise Godly children.  But, in order to do so, our parenting skills should be consistent.  Ask yourself: Do you say one thing to your children, but do another?  Do you threaten, and threaten, and threaten, but never follow through?  Consistent parenting is very important to children because it builds a sense of security and character, and ultimately leads to them having a successful life. Children need to know what the rules are and what is expected of them.  And, they need to know what happens if they break the rules or do not follow through.  

Just as our Father God gave us rules and principles to follow in the Bible and lets us know what will happen if we do not follow them, we should treat our children similarly.   First, our morals and values must be consistent.  For example, if we believe that our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19), we must treat them as special and not abuse them.  But are you consistent?  It is easy to tell your children not to drink alcohol because of all the negative ramifications, but do you drink with friends?  

Second, our rules and requirements must be consistent.   We should not require one child to behave a certain way, but allow another child to do something different and then make excuses for that child. 

Third, the consequences or discipline we impose should be consistent.  Do not threaten to impose specific discipline, but then not impose it when the time comes.  There will eventually come a point where your child will simply ignore what you say either because you never followed through or you were inconsistent in your follow through.  The last thing that we want to happen as parents is that our children do not listen to what we have to say. 

Parents Should Not Allow Their Children To Be Disrespectful

This is a very powerful quote from the great evangelist Billy Graham about disrespectful children.  We have all seen them in public – children who are disrespectful to their parents.  But, let’s look inside our own homes for a minute.  What do you allow your children to say or do to you as a parent?  Do you make excuses for your children’s behavior?

What type of action is disrespectful?  It may vary, depending on the parents’ own beliefs, but typically, name-calling, yelling, cursing, and talking back are universally deemed disrespectful.  Turning and walking away, slamming doors, hanging up the phone – these also are disrespectful actions.   

What do you do when your children act disrespectfully?  It is important to stop the action immediately and invoke age appropriate discipline, which can include losing privileges to play video games or going out with friends.  Also, be observant and catch your children acting respectfully.  Let them know that their respectful behavior has been noticed and is applauded.  Some parents believe, however, that children should be “free” to express themselves.  In my opinion, that’s when trouble begins.  If your children are allowed to be “free” to express themselves at home, and are abusive, they will continue to act the same way outside the home.