mother nagging a child ciovering her ears

Nagging your children. Nit-picking at them. These all amount to the same thing – fault-finding and criticism. Here are 6 reasons why parents should stop nagging:

Proverbs 18:21, The Passion Translation, reminds us of the importance of our words: “Your words are so powerful that they will kill or give life”. The Word of God admonishes us to speak words of life, especially over and to our children.
It makes children feel incompetent. I love this quote from American author and stress expert Lori Lite: “Look for teaching moments instead of criticizing moments.”
It weakens the bond between parent and child because the child begins to tune out.
According to Melanie Greenberg, psychologist and parenting expert, “When parents go on and on, kids tune them out. Researchers have shown that the human brain can keep only four 'chunks' of information or unique ideas in short-term (active) memory at once. This amounts to about 30 seconds or one or two sentences of speaking.”
It emphasizes the negative.
It can lead to arguments rather than resolutions.
It is not a long-term solution.

Next week’s blog post will have suggestions as to how parents can stop or at least, limit nagging.

This blog post was based generally on the online article:

https://wehavekids.com/parenting/Why-Do-We-Nag-Our-Children-and-How-Do-We-Stop

What Are You Believing For Your Children?

I am a living example that children are likely to grow up to what their parents believe of them. When I was growing up, my parents would tell me that I could become anything I wanted. They stressed hard work and a good education. Back then, there were not very many women attorneys or judges. But, that didn’t deter me because my parents had instilled in me to dream big. I worked diligently in school and if I brought home anything less than an “A” on my report card, my parents would be disappointed, telling me that I could have achieved an “A”. I would work even harder to achieve that “A” because they had told me I could.

When I became a mother, I too passed on to my two sons that they could become anything they wanted. Ask yourself – what are you believing for your children?

When I was a judge, I heard many parents tell me in the courtroom what a disappointment their children were and even call them derogatory names. All the while, their children are in the courtroom listening to what they are saying. Often, the child would be hanging his or her head down while the parent was speaking. I often cringed wondering if that is what they are saying about their children in a courtroom, I would hate to hear what they are saying to their children at home!

Proverbs 18:21 says that “Death and life are in the power of the tongue”. Examine what you are speaking about your children. Is it life, health and prosperity? Those should be the only words that you speak over them as words have no end in time and affect their eternity.