A good mystery story can keep you spellbound for a long time. You do not want to put the book down until the mystery is solved and you know who has done it. You read and try to pick out all the clues. You try your best to figure out the ending. Did you get it right after all? If not, what clues did you miss? Children love mystery stories as much as adults...
I think that many parents overlook audiobooks because they may believe that listening to them is “cheating”. They believe that the child does not really read such books, but simply listens to the narrator and therefore, gets no real benefit out of them. In my opinion however, audiobooks can be an excellent addition to your children’s literary arsenal. Just as I have promoted having a variety of reading materials for your children readily available, such as comic books, I would also include audiobooks.
I’m certain that many parents purchased or friends and relatives purchased video games for their children or other young relatives as gifts this past Christmas. As the mother of two sons, I know well the desires that children have to play video games, especially boys.
Many parents ask – can playing too many video games really hurt my child? According to developmental psychologist Douglas Gentile, the answer to that question is “Yes”. He gives the following reasons why:
Kids who spend too much time at the computer are missing out on other activities fundamental to their physical, social, intellectual, and emotional development. Time spent in front of the computer or game console is time taken away from playing with friends, reading or doing a project with you, and other activities.
Kids usually play video games alone, and too much time spent alone can foster social isolation.
Children who watch more than ten hours of TV a week don't do as well in school as kids their age who watch less. When setting limits, it's important to consider the total amount of time your child spends in front of all electronic screens — TVs, computers, movie screens, etc.
Bad habits can become ingrained and are more difficult to change as children get older. (According to research, the average American 4th-grade boy spends 9.5 hours each week playing video and computer games, in addition to other screen time.)
If your child regularly plays games with plots based on violence and aggression, research shows he is at risk for increased aggressive behavior.
There are pros to video games, though. He recommends quality games that give children the opportunity to practice problem solving and logic skills. They help the development of fine motor and coordination skills and also help children become familiar with information technology. He strongly suggests playing these games with your children as special bonding time.
When I walk into a person’s home, I can immediately know what is important to that person. Is there music playing and music paraphernalia all around? Are there toys and play areas for children in different spaces? Is there a large tv screen with surround sound and other modern equipment to make tv viewing an experience? I’m not being judgmental – simply stating facts.
Pets are a very important part of a family and can also be a creative way to encourage your children to read. Some children read to dolls or other inanimate objects as part of their play time. What about having them read to their pets? In fact, some organizations have programs where children come in and read to shelter pets. These programs encourage children to practice reading out loud and provide much needed attention for pets who are in the shelter. What a wonderful way to promote literacy!
As a mother of two boys, I know all about sleepovers. You have a house full of kids, who don’t want to sleep and who eat continuously through the day and night. Sleepovers are fun times for children. But, be cautioned. You need to protect your children from other children and even their parents who may have a bad influence on them as well as anyone else who may be in the home when your children are there for the sleepover.
I did not welcome invitations from parents whom I didn’t know. Random sleepovers were not permitted. If I knew the parents and children, I would inquire as to what types of activities were planned; who would be supervising the children; what would they be eating and drinking; and what types of games were they going to play.
Even after so much scrutiny and diligence though, something slipped by. I remember picking up my oldest son from a sleepover late one morning. He was about 10 years old at the time. As I arrived at the house, I walked in the front door to the living room. I then observed my son playing a video game with another boy. As I looked closely, to my shock and dismay, the video game involved hitting and kicking women all over their bodies (including their heads, stomachs, and private parts) in fight scenes. This was a family who attended church regularly, but the parents were not monitoring the types of video games in their house. On the drive home, I explained to my son about the problem with that video game and that men should not hit women. During the following week at church, I even spoke with the parents about the game. When I observed their nonchalant attitude, I knew my son was not going to spend time there again.
“Do not be misled: bad company corrupts good character.”
As a parent, have you ever thought about helping your children choose their friends? You may think – that’s not my role as a parent or my child should be able to choose his/her own friends. In my humble opinion, I think that parents should play a huge role in who their children consider as friends and spend time with.
I was always on the look out for good friends for my sons. Since I volunteered in the children’s ministry at my church, I had special insight into the children who attended. I closely observed the child’s and parents’ demeanors. Did the parents bring their children to church every Sunday or just once in a while? Were they on time? Were the children clean and fed? Did they have good manners? Did the parents and/or children use bad words? Did the children tell lies? What did the family do over the weekend? Was reading and doing well in school important to the child and parents?
I took the scripture verse in 1 Corinthians 15:33 very seriously because I knew that bad company has a very negative effect on good character. I wanted to raise two sons who would be Godly young men. Yes, I was called a strict parent, but what is the alternative? I encourage you to play a very active role in your children’s lives rather than just being a spectator.
“Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, the fruit of the womb is a reward.”
We just finished the Christmas season with gift giving being an important part of the celebration (of course, with Jesus at the center of it all). Many of us gave or received beautiful and expensive gifts. But did you know that your children are also precious gifts from God?
What have we done with those gifts we received this Christmas that were “precious” to us? Of course, we made sure that the gifts were well taken care of, safe and protected because we certainly do not want anything to happen to them. They are too important to us. We also spend time with those gifts, whether it is wearing them or driving in them, or going somewhere special with them. Since the gifts are so valuable to us, we want to make sure we spend significant time with them, not just a few minutes.
As gifts directly from God, don’t your children deserve such treatment, and even better? Think about ways that you can make your children feel that they are such precious gifts too you each and every day. Please don’t skip a day, though, because their memories can be short.
What do children love to do and is very natural for them? To laugh! Also, we have all heard about how good laughter is for us because it helps reduce stress.
According to the website for the Women’s and Children’s Network on Kids’ Health, some children did a survey of what made the people in their class laugh. Here is what they found:
"My little brother makes me laugh because he does such funny things - he's only a baby."
"Knock knock jokes."
"Watching funny movies."
"My friend - because he is really funny."
"My favorite comedians."
"Hanging out with my friends because we have fun together and laugh a lot."
"Watching home movies, especially when mom and dad look so funny with their hairstyles and the clothes they had when they were young."
Since my passion is to promote reading, I would like to connect the dots between encouraging reading and laughter. One of the types of books we had at our home for our sons to read were joke books. We loved to laugh and our sons seemed to be natural at laughing and joking around. The joke books were a special family treat on occasions.
Today, with the expansion of the internet, there are all sorts of websites that have good, clean jokes and riddles for children to read and enjoy. So, spend some time laughing and reading with your children. Those will be very special times indeed!
Happy new year! Yes, it’s 2016 and I have some suggestions for new year’s resolutions to help promote reading in your family.
#1 – Plan weekend family outings to your local library. I cannot mention enough about the wealth of information and books that are available in public libraries. Search the internet to find out what your library has to offer on the weekends for children and attend the events. Above all, check out books and other material for your children to read, at no cost!
#2 – Have a variety of reading materials available at home. Don’t let your children get bored with what reading materials you have. In addition to fiction, have biographies, comic books, audible books, and books in other formats (on your Kindle or iPad).
#3 – Intentionally set aside time each day to read. That will take discipline on your part. One of the best times to read is when you are putting your child to bed at night, or after dinner is finished. Don’t wait until you are totally exhausted and sleepy to do this. Plan time for reading in your schedule as you would any other important event. Remember – your child is worth it!
#4 – Limit the video and computer games. Children can sit in front of a screen (whether a large computer screen or the small screen on your mobile phone) playing games endlessly. Many parents use these games as babysitters. Instead of just having your child play these games, try downloading some good books and have your child read them. That way, they will sit quietly and develop good reading habits at the same time.
Of course, there are many more suggestions that I can make. But, let’s start with these in 2016. You will be taking a huge step by making and following through with these resolutions.
This Christmas season, one of my most favorite songs is “Mary, Did You Know?” written by Mark Lowry. In that song, Mary is asked whether she knew how great her child Jesus would be. Did Mary know that her son would walk on water? That he would calm the storm with his hand? As she kissed his face, did she know that he had come to save us? That he was the Lord of all creation? The questions continue throughout the song.
I love this song because I wonder what Mary thought about her son as she caressed him in her arms. She was chosen by God to fulfill this critical role. And as a mother, I think about my own sons. I believe that I too was chosen by God to be the mother of my sons. Do I truly know how important my sons are to God and how important they will be to their generation and generations to follow? Do I expect greatness and importance out of them? When they were babies, I held them in my arms and loved them as only a mother could. And, yes, I do expect great things from my sons, because of who they are in Christ. I know that God has great destinies for them.
People frequently complain about the direction that many of our young men and women are going. Music, clothing, hair, speech – all of these are subjects of complaints. Instead of complaining though, I believe that we should diligently seek to bring assistance. That’s where mentors are needed.
When was the last time that you mentored a child or young adult? The Apostle Paul is a very good example for us to follow. He was a mentor to young Timothy, whom Paul referred to as “his true son in the faith”. Paul knew both Timothy’s mother, Eunice, who converted to the faith, and his grandmother, Lois. Paul credited much of Timothy’s good upbringing to his mother and grandmother. As a mentor, you should get to know the child’s family as that will help you fully understand the child.
Paul spent a lot of time with Timothy as they often traveled and ministered together. Timothy was in a unique position to walk daily side by side with Paul, listen to Paul, and learn from Paul’s preaching as well as observe his demeanor. Timothy was dedicated to Paul and serving God, and as a result, Paul referred to him as “his fellow worker”. As a mentor, you should spend time with the child so the child can learn from you. Remember that you are serving as a role model, so be extremely attentive to your every word and movement.
Paul frequently expressed his praise and love for Timothy. Paul referred to him as his faithful son and his beloved child. He was proud to send Timothy to help others as Timothy had served him well and publicly commended Timothy’s service to him - as a child serves a father. As a mentor, you should encourage and praise a child often. Look for the good rather than the bad.
Don’t complain – help. Our children and young adults need your assistance in mentoring them.
Image from www.courageforkids.com
I write often about the importance of literacy. Since this month is November - the month of Thanksgiving Day - I want to merge the concepts of being thankful with reading. How can we help our children become more thankful and encourage reading at the same time?
As a Christian, I always turn first to the Bible for guidance. With so many research tools available online as well as electronic Bibles, it is relatively easy to search for verses with the words “thanks” and “thankful” in the Bible. There are many. Encourage your children to read some of these verses and write them down. One of my favorite verses is Psalm 188:1 - “Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever.”
Another idea is to have your children write on sticky notes once a day what they are thankful for and create an area in your home where they can put up these sticky notes as reminders. Examples are “I’m thankful for my dog” and “I’m thankful for a sunny day to play outside” and “I’m thankful for food to eat today”. Encourage your children to read them every day.
Also, help your children write “thank you” notes for gifts or for any occasion when such a note can be used. I recently received in the mail a “thank you” card from one of my teenage nieces thanking me for a birthday gift I sent to her. It was very special to me because it showed me that she took the time to think about thanking me and about what to write to me and then she took the time to actually write it out to me. That one little handwritten note showed me that she cared for me and wanted to let me know how much she cared.
The list of ideas is endless. Begin incorporating some in your day to day activities.
MY son, James, with his first book.
Many parents talk about the difficulties they have in getting their sons to read more. They complain about the fact that reading is seen as being nerdy and it’s challenging to find books that boys like. In classrooms, teachers often seem at a loss as to how to encourage the boys to read more. Many just don’t know about the plethora of subjects that boys like to read about and what books are available.
I’m a mother of two sons and understand those sentiments. However, I profoundly believe that parents should be determined and assertive in fostering the good habit of reading in their children. My late husband and I were good role models for our sons because we read a lot, individually and as a family. I often would go to my sons’ schools to speak to teachers if I believed reading wasn’t being encouraged enough and suggested good books for the students. We even purchased books for a school’s library to encourage reading.
Now with the internet, there is so much information available and even websites dedicated to boys reading such as www.guysread.com so there is no excuse. Don’t just sit back and expect your children, especially boys, to develop the love of reading. Find out what subjects they are interested in and then go and look for books on those subjects. If your son is interested in robots for example, actively search for books on robots. I found that my sons loved reading books about intergalactic wars and soon found that many came in wonderful series. We visited bookstores and libraries to get as many books in various series as we could.
I would love to hear what you have done to encourage your children to read, especially your sons. Please let me know.
From Disney's The Princess & the Frog movie.
“If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales.”
Oh those wonderful fairy tales! I read so many as I was growing up. The Princess and the Frog - Cinderella – Rumpelstiltskin – Little Red Riding Hood - and many, many more. Those stories were so enjoyable and filled with immense creativity that stirred my imagination. Are there really talking frogs? Why would a princess kiss a frog? Can a frog actually turn into a handsome prince? Would the prince ever be able to turn back into a frog again?
Why read fairy tales to and with your children? The genius Albert Einstein knew why, and that is the foundation for his quote which inspired my blog post. He understood what I as a child experienced while reading them – a creative imagination being massaged and developed. Fairy tales cause a child’s mind to think outside of the box, beyond every day natural occurrences. They stir a young brain to work and think differently and to ask questions. If a princess will kiss a frog, what else is possible? With our imagination, we can imagine anything. I truly believe that Einstein read so many fairy tales that they eventually impacted his intelligence, ultimately causing him to come up with the theory of relativity.
